This is what we call an attempt at positivity, alright? You might find this upside down, but what we’re doing here is trying to set this right-side up, all in the spirit of v’nahaphoch hu of course… Wish me luck. Here we go –
Why IF Rocks:
- Mikva Excuses! Is it just me, or does everyone use Mikva as an excuse left, right and center? “No, I’m so sorry, I can’t make it, it’s personal.” “Um, I would really love to be there but, y’know…” Said with a good does of blushing, (yes, I’m terrible I know!) no one has to know that you haven’t seen the mik and don’t plan on any time in the near future – we hope… Give me some credit, this isn’t like saying a total outright untruth. Plus, it makes the inquirer feel nice ‘n guilty. (Insert wicked laugh) Plain and simple, it’s the best way to pass on any event you have no interest in attending.
Vacation!Yup, right, with all that extra dough. Ok, skip this one.
- Medical Expertise Just think about it – you can totally start a career in medicine! Maybe as a nurse, ultrasound technician, embryologist, or (gasp) phlebotomist? Or not. But case in point, you most certainly will gain an appreciation for your bodily functions and the marvellous way we were created… Unfortunately we often learn this in the inverse, like “oh, that’s what my body should be doing – really?!” Sigh.
- Shul Time Yes, our minyan had to establish a ladies section for chez moi. And by that, I mean me alone. We’re a young (and rather fertile) kehilla ka”h. To be fair, some women actually joined our little cozy ladies section on Rosh HaShana. Although to be fairer, I could’ve charged them rent for intruding on my turf. But I’m sweet like that, so I didn’t.
- Free Time oh boy, if you’re IF you risk overdosing on this so please do be careful. (joke.)
- Zchuyos. No, not mine. Yours, along with every yenta out there. I get to be the inspiration for your 40-days-40-ladies-40-challos-40tefillos-x40 initiative, while you get to collect merit as you pray, sway, and do your best to keep me posted on these elevated happenings. You must be so holy by now, I’m almost jealous 😉
Oh wait, that’s six! Oops. Joking aside, truthfully there are reasons why I’m appreciative, and sometimes even grateful, for our current status. And while by no chance does that knock out the many reasons that too often drag me down, it does help to keep things in perspective. There’s what to be thankful for if we know how to look, and at the very least, there’s always a reason to laugh…